First thoughts on marriage before getting married… Marriage is but a convention. Is a human convention to help us keep a certain order in this world.
The secret of a happy marriage (or relationship) is a subjective thing. A few things are sure:
- being friends is as important as being in love;
- communication is the wheels of any relationship/marriage;
- both sides need to work hard to keep it working;
- be funny and optimistic, and prepare to also take kicks in the but;
- the perfect marriage is the one you make it so;
- there are no soul mates, other half and match made in heaven, but some people can connect faster;
- staying in a marriage or relationship is the decision of ones self;
- it’s up to us to stay with somebody even after we get to know him or her;
- it’s clear that we usually fall in love with our projection and then with the more real partner;
- there is no perfect partner, only great tolerance, acceptance and optimism;
- a new world is born with each relation: a clash of her and him;
- any relation is how you see it: working or not. How you see it contributes to how you’ll experience it;
Marriage is as good as any relationship, and in many modern societies it’s easier to have some papers. Other than that, it’s the decision of being together that matters, since no paper or religious ceremony can keep it from working great or falling apart. Actually, sometimes it’s right after marriage that the psychological shift happens and people can begin feeling constraints.
Happiness of the couple is in between the happiness of both partners. If you want to change your partner to be more like you want him or her to be, no matter how open the other is, it will result in in happiness for just one side. So both sides need to converge to a common happiness by keeping ones soul and beliefs but also adapting. And although this may seem like less happiness, I view it as a different type of happiness. It can be a new level, it can be next level.